Monday, April 9, 2012

Loss - A private feeling

Define "Loss". What is the feeling of "Loss"? Think about it. I am pretty sure everyone has lost something or someone very dear to him/her sometime to know well about both the feeling and the word.
The reason I ask the question is because I hear people quantifying loss and talking of how great their loss is, often rediculing the loss of someone else. To substantiate my point I shall ask one more question :

Whos is a greater loss?

A child who just lost his favourite toy and has been crying over it ?
A girl who just ended a 7 year long relationship which she thought would last forever?
A guy, the sole bread winner in the family, who lost his job?
A man in 40's who lost his mother two days back?

I dont know if you have an answer to it or not. I would hope not because I dont know of any words that would console any of them at that point of time (unless they choose to pretend to make you good about yourself)
It might look like what is in a toy? It can be bought again. What even if a relationship broke off? It was not meant to be and there must be someone better for her. Job? There are many ways of earning money,one just need to look. And then at around 70, one should be contended  to think she did not suffer much.
But then, Imagine yourself at any of those position and maybe then things will change. Maybe then a broken toy would mean the world to you. Maybe then a broken relationship would mean a broken life and maybe then a job lost would feel like killing yourself.

As much as one would want to quantify a feeling like Loss, there is no way one can. Not for a second person.
Loss is only when you Love. When you cannot measure a second persons love  (which again people mistakenly do quite often), it tacitly implies that Loss cannot be measured for a second person. One can only know ones own loss as he/she only loves what is lost and no one else would know. To rephrase, one can only know what has been a greater loss to himself.

Loss is abstract and it has different meanings to different people.

So then, form what I think, never should anyone quantify his/her loss to measure against someone elses loss.
 Let the loss be yours, for it is as private, as personal as anything in the world can ever be!

Iceberg shows more.
More of what does not melt.
What melts lies inside,
deep within,
as it melts slowly
weeping in despair.
In its own private moment
it melts,very privately.
No sound, no words.
Nothing. Blue world and
many many more icebergs
are all that is around.


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